Anthony weaver tALKs violence = “Y’ALL BEEN SOFT”

The press conference ended and I sat watching this presser like did Anthony Weaver just say that?

Because yeah — Weaver flat‑out called his defense soft.

But he didn’t just call them soft. He tried to sprinkle in love like caramel on a Krispy Kreme donut. That’s one of the funniest coach flexes I’ve heard/seen in a minute. You could feel the room get tighter as he said it.

And like the stone cold G that he is, Weaver didn’t blink. He’s tossing grenades but smiling while he pulls the pins.

Weaver told Kenneth Grant and the rest of the line that they’ve got technique issues, fundamentals issues.

Then he said the second you get complacent, you’re on your way out the NFL. And try it and see if he’s lying because he’s not sugarcoating it. He’s biting hard, but with a wink. This isn’t a motivational poster; it’s a gut check.

Weaver’s saying if you want to wear a Dolphins jersey you better wear it like armor and not a bathrobe.

“VIOLENCE” the WORD OF THE week

Weaver didn’t sugarcoat it, and why would he? The Dolphins’ run defense has been a turnstile through four weeks:

23rd in first downs allowed per rush
24th on third-down rush conversions
26th in defensive EPA per rush
28th in rush first downs allowed
29th in yards per carry
30th in runs of 10+ yards allowed
30th in yards before contact
30th in success rate
30th in total rushing yards

That’s not a slump. That’s a bottom-of-the-barrel résumé.

So Weaver simply did what every defense coordinator would do, Weaver made Gregg Williams proud and he called for “violence.” His words. The legal version of Bountygate.

Weaver wants defenders who rip the ball like one of those clips where somebody barefoot runs next to a car and snatches your phone right out the car window. He’s basically telling his unit: quit playing tag, start playing demolition derby.

He even admitted nobody rides the first-round pick harder than he does. He’s daring the kid to sink or swim. And he didn’t stop there — he pointed to missed tackles, sloppy hands, busted fundamentals. This isn’t just a D-line issue. It’s a roster issue. It’s a culture issue.

And Weaver? He’s not hiding from it. He’s lighting the match.

Don’t get it twisted either because Weaver’s not bashing just Kenneth Grant. He’s bashing the entire front.

“I don’t think you can pinpoint any one player,” he says. But one line stood out: “a lot of those balls are getting to the second level.”

Translation:The line is leaking like an old faucet. It’s a public roast but with a chef’s kiss of “I believe in you.”

He compliments Brooks and Dodson — “war daddies,” “constantly attacking the ball.” He doesn’t want to kill their instincts. But he says the line’s got to hold up so those guys aren’t doing all the heavy lifting. That’s the soft yard he’s throwing shade at. And the way he delivered it — like a dad telling his kid he’s proud but also grounding him — made it hit harder.

He says he doesn’t want to judge Grant after four games. He’s buying the kid time. But time only buys you so much when your defense is soft and getting torched. Dolphins fans can take “be patient” only so long. Weaver knows it.

WHAT next after the ROAST?

You lean into it.

Clip all the “soft” and “violence” lines.

Make memes of the phone analogy. Use the contrast — soft + tough love — as content fuel. Roast the D‑line a bit.

Then back it up: those linebackers are cooking, but they’re cooking because y’all kept finger‑poking holes in the front.

You want drama? You got it. You want humor? Easy.

You want accountability? Weaver’s handing it out free today.

This wasn’t coach‑speak. This was a warning shot.

And it came with just enough charm to make you nod along while he smacked you with the truth.